019. Essential Things for Mindfulness and Self-Compassion Practices around yourself and food
This week on The 4Ms (#019), I teamed up with Dr. Paula Freedman & we’re talking all about self-compassion, mindfulness, and Health at Every Size.
Dr. Paula Freedman is a Clinical Psychologist and Certified Intuitive Eating Counselor in Chicago. She owns her own practice called HumanKind Psychological Services, and she provides psychotherapy, educational resources, supervision and consultation. She specializes in anxiety-related disorders, eating disorders and disordered eating, and addictive and compulsive behaviors.
We discussed mindfulness practices, and Dr. Freedman thinks of mindfulness practices as things we do every day, like taking a shower or brushing our teeth or eating or breathing! She says we are so used to operating on autopilot that we don’t pay attention to all of the nuance and sensations involved in our moment-to-moment experiences. She feels like those experiences are not mundane if we’re truly engaged with them without judgment. Going for a walk, or cooking and eating a meal, or laying in bed at night becomes so rich and rewarding when you do it all mindfully.
We discussed self-compassion practices. There are a few main questions that she finds really guides people to connect to self-compassion. Where did I learn to believe these things/ tell myself these things? What would be different for me if I believed something else? What would I think about (or say to) a loved one who felt the way I’m feeling right now? Hint: if you’d feel like a jerk for saying it about a small child, or your best friend, it’s probably a cruel and dismissive thing to say to yourself, too! Another way to have this really hit home is to have people look at a photo of themselves as a young child- maybe age 2 or 3- and notice what they feel if they say the mean things they’ve been directing at themselves to that little kid. It’s harder to consider yourself the exception (as in, other people deserve compassion but I don’t) when you’re face to face with an innocent little child- and then you realize, that child is YOU, and that inner child is still there and still deserves kindness.
And the 2 biggest questions to get in the habit of asking for cultivating self-compassion: What am I FEELING? And what do I NEED?
We talked about diet culture. Dr. Freedman talks about how her health improved now that she is not spending so much time stressed about her body, and the weight science research confirms this. People who live the longest and have the best quality of life are those who have peaceful relationships with food, don’t limit or restrict themselves on any food, and have strong relationships and a strong sense of community. As a society, we don’t give nearly enough importance to those social and emotional factors when it comes to health outcomes.
We dive into the higher self, tools for when we get anxious around food, and health behaviors + habit science.
To listen, head to my bio for the link, or search “The 4Ms with Molly” wherever you listen to podcasts.
Connect With Me:
Instagram: @unsinkablemollynp
Connect With Dr. Paula Freedman
Instagram: mindful.drpaula
Website: https://www.humankindpsych.com/
